'He demanded that I take it down but I declined': Guy demands ex-wife take down embarrassing video of him at a wedding

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  • 01
    Font - r/AmItheAhole u/miniT354345 1 day ago Posted by AITA for refusing to take down a video of my kids father dancing at my brother's wedding? My children's dad & I got seperated and divorced 2 years ago. We're on good terms regarding co parenting. And since he's close to my brother, my brother had invited him to his wedding. Perfectly okay with me since the kids were thrilled to get extra time with dad.
  • 02
    Font - I was taking a video of mom and my kids at the wedding and posted it on my insta. Hours later, I get a call from my ex yelling about my camera catching him dancing drunkenly in the background. I said "so what?!?!" He told me he's getting engaged to his conservative girlfriend soon and if her or her conservative family saw him in this video then there's gonna be trouble. I thought that was silly. He demanded that I take it down but I declined. He insisted saying he was "technically" record
  • 03
    Font - Mom is saying I should take it down but I feel like he's trying to control my social media activity. AITA for refusing? He said that his girlfriend can and WILL see it via the kids since they're with me on social media.
  • 04
    Font - chriswillar 23 hr. ago Partassipant [1] Ask yourself this - is that "silly" video worth destroying your co- parenting relationship with him right now? Because he is absolutely in the right to demand you take it down if he's featured in it. No one says you have to delete it off your phone, so the memory isn't gone, but it's petty of you to insist it should remain online. YTA 25.7k Reply Shar
  • 05
    Font - chriswillar 23 hr. ago Partassipant [1] Also - a wedding tends to be a private event, not public. He's in his right to ask for privacy. 4 4.1k Reply S
  • 06
    Font - Alternative_Year_340 23 hr. ago Colo-rectal Surgeo... Not really. He has no reasonable expectation of privacy - especially not when it's generally expected there will be photography. (The point about damaging the co- parenting relationship stands. But I doubt that relationship will survive the ex's new relationship anyway.) 5.0k Reply
  • 07
    Font - DamnYouPatrice 23 hr. ago One thing is to consent photos/videos, another is having them posted online. 1.2k Reply
  • 08
    Font - Alternative_Year_ 340 23 hr. ago Colo-rectal Su... Welcome to 2022. You have no reasonable expectation of privacy in public and no right to prevent videos taken in public from being posted on social media. 1.8k Reply
  • 09
    Font - particledamage. 22 hr. ago Partassipant [1] I... don't know about this one. If you go to a wedding, you should expect to have your picture/video taken. Most weddings have photographers who are hired not just to take pictures of the couple but also of guests in notable moments. Don't do anything at a weddnig you don't want any permanent memory of.
  • 10
    Font - That said, you still have a right ot ask people to not post this stuff publicly. Just don't be surprised if they say no. Or if people you don't even know have stuff of you in the background. 1.1k Reply S
  • 11
    Font - Netflxnschill 22 hr. ago THIS! There is a reasonable expectation at a wedding that there will be photos and videos and you'll be in the background or foreground of a few of them. If he didn't want to be caught drunk dancing, he shouldn't have gotten drunk and danced. 516 Reply
  • 12
    Font - Frosty-Ad8676. 20 hr. ago Partassipant [1]] This isn't a legal question. His expectation of privacy has no bearing on the morality of OP's actions. If someone asks for a video that they are in to be taken off social media it will nearly always be the case that failure to do so is an AH move.
  • 13
    Font - RybusonRye 21 hr. ago Odds are that peaceful co-parenting relationship is going to get nuked anyway the second the ex is married if his new gf is the type to freak out over a video of him dancing. 924 Reply Share
  • 14
    Font - Notabot9752 20 hr. ago VOTED It was nuked when Ex used the kids against OP. 601 Reply S
  • 15
    Font - JuliaX1984 21 hr. ago Partassipant [3] Doing something on the background at a crowded gathering is not "featured." If he needs to lie to his fiancee, she shouldn't be marrying him. Is he gonna ask the kids to lie about his behavior at the wedding for him? If it really does violate his rights, he can report it, and the site will take it down, but he can't give OP the duty to help him cover up his behavior, and taking on that job is ot worth good coparenting. "Just agree to keep them happy"
  • 16
    Font - NTA He didn't have to get drunk and dance. He did it willingly, and now he wants to lie to his fiancee/marry someone he needs to lie to to earn their love. That's his problem. 4 608 Reply Sha

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